Sometimes we are surprised when one of these pops up, October 23rd, 2016 marks a couple rather important and amazing milestones… first of all – Ken is now 39! Where has the time gone? I am so grateful to his parents for creating such an amazing individual way back in ’77. One year from 40 and creeping up on 20 years since I became friends with him. Life has taken us all over the place in reality and in growth and I am so in love with him.
The second milestone was the one that sort of crept up on us. This is the very first year, the very first birthday for Ken that we have celebrated together and had the firm knowledge that he is truly on the road to healthy. The first birthday completely unshadowed by active thoughts and concerns of depression looming over us. And that is a HUGE milestone.
We are able to look at today as a total celebration, as a reaffirmation that not only is it another year along our journey but it is another year of Ken embracing joy, potential and affirmation. We have moved beyond the circled wagons and the fear of regression and were able to sit back today and really enjoy a Ken focus day.
Which of course meant lots of sitting around and, well, gaming… or in my case, sitting around and crocheting while reading manga. To see a real smile on Ken’s face, true emotions shining out, well… my heart was full.
The 23rd marked, for us, proof of progress. A day full of moments where we are able to feel the positive effect of all the work, all the sweat and tears and careful planning and discussion that our path has brought us through. It is the fact that we can celebrate a milestone together that reminds me of how close I could have come to losing him. How precious it is that his wish to be healthy coincides with our love and wish for him to always be here with us.
Depression will never be out of our life completely. A part of me is always going to watch for signs in Ken, worry that this is something that my kids could in turn develop and need support through. This is the reality for us, for myself. And I am ok with that. With a bit of diligence and open hearted honesty here, maybe in watching out for my family I can help watch out for others? I would love to hear that there were other people out there who are also reaching unexpected milestones.
So October 23rd, 2016 is proof positive that we are on our way. Up and down, whatever is thrown at us, that day, those moments, the laughter and the quiet peaceful together time is in my heart to remind me of our success.
I hope that everyone reading this is able to find some milestones to celebrate. As always, I like to think we are in this together. Feel free to comment or share below.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEN!
Some milestones jump out at you, hit you over the head and refuse to be ignored. Significant birthdays and the like. Others slide past and sometimes you don’t realise that they were a milestone for some time afterwards.
My personal one was realising I didn’t have to prove myself, every single minute to someone who was never going to accept me as I was.
Wishing Ken a slightly belated Happy Birthday, and remember as you get older, and time goes faster, birthday celebrations can last for days, if not weeks.
Thank you Bernie! Isn’t it amazing when you hit those marks??